To have or to not have a baby

Posted byContent CatnipPosted inA Day in the Life, BlogTags:, , , , ,
A pink and apricot sunset on the beach

What’s the hardest decision you’ve ever had to make? Why?

This was the hardest decision I’ve ever had to make and one of the most personal.

In the end I decided not to. Mainly because the reasons for having one just weren’t compelling or convincing enough for me. The reasons not to were more convincing:

A future where AI would take all jobs and render humans largely obsolete didnt instil much faith in me that a child would have the same opportunities as I did, for education and work.

A future where climate change takes it’s toll on the natural world leading to food and water shortages and the extinction of many animals. A lack of resources leading to more conflict.

Seeing on the news all of the time how this child or that child was the victim of violence or was taken too soon I felt a tiny inkling of the pain this would have brought to the family, I would find such pain unbearable. Yet another reason.

Anyway those are my reasons. The reasons for having them: satisfying my curiosity about what the person would look like, satisfying my family’s desire for intergenerational continuity this didn’t seem like strong enough of a reason. Life is hard and tough with a lot of pain and disappointment, weirdly I didn’t want to bring a person into the world who would suffer the same as everyone else.

I hope that makes sense. Because of societal pressures it was a hard decision but inside I always knew it was the right one for me.

Published by Content Catnip

Content Catnip is a quirky internet wunderkammer written by an Intergalactic Space Māori named Content Catnip. Join me as I meander through the quirky and curious aspects of history, indigenous spirituality, the natural world, animals, art, storytelling, books, philosophy, travel, Māori culture and loads more.

15 thoughts on “To have or to not have a baby”

  2. Yes it makes a lot of sense. Having a child is a huge decision and one that too many people take far too lightly. My son is 58 and my daughter will be 50. Obviously i had them when the world was a very different place….Would I do it now….I don’t think so…Everything has gone too far.

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    1. Thank you dear Janet 😘 for your insightful response. I would likely have had a baby if I was living in that world too, the world of previous decades so fully understand 🤗 yes agree, everything has gone too far and become really unpredictable

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  4. It’s probably the biggest decision ever to decide to have a baby or not. For me it was never a hard one, I always known that I didn’t want any kids in my life, at least not that would put me in the mother role. That doesn’t suit me at all.

    And you’re right. The future looks so dark. I fear for my nieces and nephew. I do hope they’ll grow up in a better world, but the chances are quite slim for that unfortunately.

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    1. hi dear friend thank you for this thoughtful and in-depth reply it’s so good to know someone else understands the reasons behind this important life choice and that you fully understand. Yes I feel exactly the same for my niece and nephew, both beautiful human beings inside and out and I fear for their futures too. We can only hope we can fight for the change that is needed so that they can have a decent quality of living in the future. Big hugs

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  5. Beyond of have a responsibility, I see more a thing of what kind of life you have, for much have a child is a new love life, if you live in communism country have a baby can be something i mean not sad but yes difficult because you cannot give the life that you want to have but even many people do with love. now if you have a good job, live in a good country, have freedom and much love to give. have your baby . others is just a matter of style of life, wont babies because then they cannot feel meet their goals… doesnt mean is bad… just point of views. if you have a baby give all the love and support that can be. greetings.

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  6. I think you’re not alone… in the past it wasn’t even really treated as a decision; women got married and had children, fullstop. I am glad that we live in a time and place where my two daughters will be able to decide for themselves what they want. They are still teenagers, but already one is saying probably yes, and one is saying probably no. You do you – always. Linda xx

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