I’ve fallen into that delightful and gradual fantasy yet again.
You would also know this one, it’s comfy, cosy and always clings to your body like a well-worn jumper, there’s some holes from moths and some dust from yesteryear on it. Nobody would say it’s fashionable, but I cling to it as a child clings to a teddy bear.
Yes, the idea that “Other humans living around me in my neighborhood are harmless, kind and honest.”
A test of that hypothesis happened last night when, for the first time ever, I left my bike unlocked on my doorstep.
Boldly, some upstanding member of the community made the bike vanish. Not that it was expensive. You know – material things come and go, you can’t take them to the grave, Buddhist non-attachment.. all of that.
What hurt was the violation of my beliefs about human nature. The stubbornly hopeful candle that I hold up to the chaotic world in order to function within in it.
Could it be that we are all good really, we are just beset by bad circumstances and pushed into things out of desperation, economic, social, historical and political? Is that how it is….or is there disclaimers to it, times when doing shitty things is acceptable?
Or could it be that some people are born bad and evil and are destined only to do bad things on this earth?
The judge and jury is the media, mediated by various religions and other institutions of course all of us prefer a clear narrative arc with the goodies and the baddies because then it makes it easier to be indignant and angry at someone from outside, the dreaded “over there”.
Anyway it becomes easier to “other” people who steal and cause chaos in this world, it’s just how we cope. It doesn’t seem nice or compassionate though. Also fully aware of how minor an infarction it is compared to something else, some other crime. Yet it makes you realise how we gradually can lose touch with reality if we allow ourselves. I am the type to generously meet people though with all of my optimism and thoughts that they are good not meeting anyone with suspicion.
I don’t know the answer to all this, have you ever thought about these kinds of things?
Content Catnip 
It hurts when people break sacred bonds. We believe they are sacred. Others don’t, and therefore have no problem in breaking them. Along with your heart and your trust. People are strange and opportunistic. I just hope they really needed it. Always lock everything. Just in case. 💔
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You are spot on Trish it does hurt….or rather its uncomfortable to have to stop trusting people so much. Beautifully said my dear… yes I willbe locking everything down for sure…absolutely everything from now on. Big hugs to you xx
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I used to believe that all people were good, you just needed to give them a chance. (In fact, I’ve written a blog post about it, but I’m a little scared to share it.) There’s trust involved, the Golden Rule, and the fact that the moral fabric that used to hold societies up have since been ripped apart due to economic divides, the glorification of $$$ and power, and a host of distractions that keep us from being in touch and connected on a deeper level.
I’m sorry about your bike. I get it. You get it. But it still sucks, and theft involving home and people is a dirty crime. I hope you can make your peace with it because that’s the best we can do, isn’t it? Easier said than done.
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You should share that blog post Lani…often the best posts are these more raw and personal ones I would love to read your take on this. Thank you for your thoughts and you are spot on, that it’s the unspoken rules we all live with. Your observations are very deep and insightful on this about the economic and social fabric being ripped apart, distractions all of it. It is almost hard to put your finger on it exactly but yet it’s still very tangible. We are less together and connected than we used to be. I read this book recently on all these topics and I think you would love it. Its so good that I haven’t brought myself to review it for fear I won’t do it justice. Xxx How to do nothing by Jenny Odell https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2019/apr/02/jenny-odell-how-to-do-nothing-attention
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Thank you. I will. Your post prompted me to take another look at it 🙂 And I’ll check out the article, appreciate it. Hugs and kisses from Cambodia!
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Hugs and kisses back at you 😘 💓
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I used to hold the same good beliefs about people, but the way society shifted during the pandemic and beyond has broken that for me. I’ve seen social politeness vanish, selfishness and anger reign supreme, people not even caring about thousands of deaths because they were “just” old, or disabled, or poor. I live in a country where the far-right are emboldened, where racists scream at immigrants, and politicians close borders to refugees, where transphobia is in the media and on the streets every day and I know that there’s a non-zero chance that the next random person I meet wants me, and people like me, gone. My attitude now is to assume the worst, and if someone surprises me by being a decent human being, then that’s a bonus. Mostly I keep to myself, and enjoy the company of nature instead.
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Oh god that is horrible dear River and yet what you are saying is a realistic point of view. It is borne out of your own experiences and from watching the news which never fails to deliver the worst of human nature to our eyeballs. I wonder though if we can exist together in micro communities sometimes remote and online with people who care for each other and understand and are respectful to each other. I like to think these places still exist even if we have to create them ourselves and invite people who are great in there. I sort of created this with my animal activism, people of all ages, genders and backgrounds all together, if you have a common goal fighting for justice for animals or what have you it becomes easier to form your friendships based on this. I agree though it has gotten harder these days. Big hugs to you
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It makes me so sad that people can be hateful based on someone’s gender or sexuality it really does. I would hug you now if I could
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